Earth Angel
by DreamerChick
Summary: It just got better. If you like girl accepted to Welton, Charlie is back but want something completly different..try this, you'll enjoy it. DISCONTINUED! Read at your own risk
1. Everyday People

Earth Angel

A/N: I have to do it, else I won't be able to live without seeing DPS everyday. I have to have my alter ego in short lived and tragic romance with my movie love, this time the object of my obsession is a certain dark eyed, dark haired, easily love-struck Knox T Overstreet. Amber is my alter ego, but her past and family history are in no way connected to my own, it just gives a fuel to Amber's personality. 

being who I am, I will have some sappy tear-filled moments but not too many. Just at appropriate places. Dark it will be, that I can promise with a side of sarcasm. 

I apologize for my two semi-anachronisms

1:Technically speaking, the women's rights movement didn't start until the 70's, but there had to have been a few women's rights activists before that. 

2: Irish Dance didn't get big in the US, or the South, where Amber is from, until the 90's, but it was here in the 50's and 60's, just not as big. It's just the only form of dance I know well enough, and do sometimes. 

Now the most important part of any fan-fiction: disclaimer- Sadly, I don't own any of the boys,as much as I'd love to have Knox. Peter Weir, if you want to give him to me, I'd gladly take him, and all of them. I'd share them, I swear.

Amber is mine, nobody would want her, but if you do, ask me and I'll let you have her, as long as she's back by midnight.

I don't own any poetry, unless I say differently. 

Please read and review, under 2 conditions:

1:no flames- they will be used to char-broil my Whopper

2:If you don't like something, tell me how to fix it- I can't read minds.

I plan on this being my first attempt at a multi chapter story not up in one lump sum.......OOPS, I'm a-rambling. I'll shut up now.

It was 1960 and the papers all proclaimed it quite boldly: WELTON GOES CO-ED. Under that banner was typically the same general picture: A middle-aged woman, a beauty in her time to be sure, but it had faded, was agitated about something, and was typically making a huge a speech. Always with her was a teenage girl, who looked highly embarrassed. That girl was Amber Floyd and,thanks to her mother's tireless efforts, she was the first girl admitted to Welton. Her mother was so perturbed about Welton's exclusion of girls, that she missed the whole second part of Charles Dalton's expulsion papers, which she had found by some probably unethical method, and only saw his outburst about girls being admitted the previous year as the reason he was sent out. So she got him re-instated. Welton agreed readily to Ms. Floyd's arguments there and even allowed Dalton to rejoin his class after intense summer school so as not to be behind. They didn't want to be any more embarrassed. 

As opening cermonies began, the student body looked around to find the new addition. Some were admittadly disappointed to discover she was hardly tall,thin, blonde or exotic. In fact, she was rather average looking. Sitting down, she was a few heads above the seventh and eighth graders but quite a few heads below the rest. She wasn't thin, she was about a 12 or 14, not the size 4 some boys were hoping for. Her dark brown hair was worn in a neat bun at the base of her neck. And that new uniform was highly unattractive. A black, knee-length jumper, with a Welton symbol on a front pocket, placed in a most innapropriate place, with a white collared shirt, and a red and black tie.

Most, however, were quite appriciative of Amber's presence. She was, after all, a woman. A living, breathing woman in a sea full of young men and boys. 

On the other hand, a few boys found her rather pleasing to look at, and one, a certain Knox Overstreet, found her downright attractive. He'd recently broken it off with Chris Noel, as, once she was attained, she was all beauty and no substance. Amber appeared deep in thought, which meant she had substance, something Knox was slowly relizing he needed. 

Mr. Nolan figured the papers had called enough attention to the fact that Amber was attending Welton, so he did little to acknowledge it. In fact, he did nothing. He'd worry about his speech the following year, when Welton truly became co-educational.

No matter how little Nolan said, Amber braced her self for whispers and stares. She got plenty of them. She heard the phrase "not what I expected" often in hushed voices, and most boys stared at her as if she was from another planet, as she struggled with her suitcase to the Senior boys hall. Her mother had lost only one battle with Nolan, and that was the battle over sleeping arangements. Ms. Floyd had wanted Amber to share a dorm with a boy, but Nolan could be pushed only so far. Amber was allowed to stay in the same hall as the Senior boys, but in a single room. That arrangement suited Amber fine. After all, she'd never had to share a room, being an only child and a public school girl to boot.

As Amber struggled with her luggage, she cursed her mother for putting her in this sitution. After all the fuss she had made, Amber would never be able to ask a member of the male species for help with anything as long as she was in Welton. 

Amber was nearly halfway to her room when she saw two boys approach her, one of average height, with dark hair parted neatly, and dark eyes, another taller,with lighter eyes.

"I, uh, hate to ask, but do you need help with those, Miss Floyd?" The dark-eyed one asked.

"Please, do. I'm Amber, not Miss Floyd, and, uh, my mom's the milatant feminist jackass who would die rather than except a man's help, not me" 

Both boys raised eyebrows, as Amber extended a hand and a suitcase. Amber's bitterly sarcastic tone was unheard of from girls in 1960. The taller one extended his hand first. 

" I should really thank your mother, Amber. She saved my ass. I'm Ch..." 

"Charlie- "Phone-Call-From-God" -Dalton. My mother's other cause. And you are?" Amber held out her hand as Charlie took the luggage dumbfounded. 

"Knox Overstreet.Welcome to Welton. You are huge news, and a welcome change around here." Knox took the other luggage without being asked.

"Nice to meet you both." Amber began leading them toward the end of the hall, were a supply closet had been turned into a single dorm.

"She landed a room right next to us, Knox," Charlie murmured as they reached the door. Amber opened it, and the boys look around. The room barely held a bed, a desk, and a dresser, but it was a makeshift room after all. 

As soon as the bags were down, Amber let down her guard enough to take in the boys for the first time. Charlie was attractive enough, in his bad boy way. Amber liked the bad boys a bit, but Knox, with is soulful eyes and over-all sweet look, Amber nearly melted to a puddle then and there. As harsh and sarcastic a front as she put up, Amber was truly very gentle and kind when her guard was down.

Nobody said anything for a while, even Charlie was speechless. Amber broke the silence.

"I'm sorry for how harsh I sounded back there, I know you guys were hoping for like an angel. I just don't like the position my mom has put me in." 

Charlie feigned shock, "What, you didn't want to come to 'Hell-Ton'?"

Amber laughed. "Hell-ton? Is that what you call this place? That's pretty good."

Amber began to unpack her things, as few of them as they were. A few notebooks, a picture or two, and a small deskset were on top. She place these items behind her, near the desk, and began to unpack the clothing. Five uniforms, each a more depressing shade of the black than the rest, came out next. They were followed by two pairs of dress slacks, a few nice blouses, and a couple of "Sunday Best" dresses. Amber unpacked a nightgown and wrinkled her nose in disgust. It was long, black, and nun-like. A plaid robe, as another means of keeping her totally covered, was folded around it. A lovely Welton sweatshirt completed the clothing layer, which she placed on her bed, as neatly folded as could be. 

"You don't have to stay here, you know. I can unpack by myself. I'm a big girl." Amber said, pretending not to notice Dalton, who was trying to slyly stare at her underwear, which was the next thing she was going to unpack. 

"We don't have much else to do today, except get our extra-curriculars. What do you say we introduce you around to our friends." Knox said, as Charlie averted his eyes,slowly.

Amber held back a laugh, and said gratefully, " Thanks. I'd like that, but give me like 20 minutes to unpack and get used to my sparse surroundings." 

"Okay, we'll see you in twenty. Come on Charlie, let the lady unpack." Knox headed toward the door, Charlie close behind him. Amber shut the door and laughed. If those two had friends as different from them as they were from each other, but still as fun,Amber knew that maybe Welton wasn't so bad, after all.

*******************************************

Almost exactly 20 minutes later, Amber heard a knock at her door. "Come in." She called and the door creaked open and Knox, Charlie and three other guys entered. The other three viewed Amber with the same wide-eyed curiosity as she was slowly getting used to around Welton. 

"Guys, meet Amber Floyd, the first girl admitted to Hell-ton." Charlie said, as he straddled the desk chair. Knox was at the foot-end the bed, Amber was sitting on her feet on the head end. 

"Nice to meet you, Amber, I'm Steven Meeks." The shortest of the group said, from his place leaning against the wall, pushing up his glasses. 

"Gerard Pitts" A second boy introduced himself from the opposite wall. 

"Todd Anderson" The third boy was standing near the door and he spoke in barely a whisper.

"Nice to meet you all." Amber smiled warmly, shaking each boys hand in turn. 

"So, Amber, what makes your mother so, energetic about getting you here.?" Meeks asked the question that was on everybody's mind.

"It's a chance for her name to be in the papers. Anybody else would quietly accept the injustace, which by-the-way, I don't see at all, especially if it ment uprooting from Virginia to Vermont, taking an only child who has never set a foot in a boarding school, and dragging their daughter from her dance lessons and competitions. Not my mother, oh no." Amber's sarcastic tone was an easing force, after all, they'd been expecting an angel.

"You're a dancer? What kind do you do?" Knox asked, the first of many questions Amber knew she'd get.

"Yeah. Irish Step. It's kind of out there, but it's a lot of fun. Competitions and awards. The dresses are scadoulously short, almost two whole inches above my knee. I love it so much." Amber normally hated talking about herself, but this was different. Dance was her passion.

"So, what makes your mother want so many causes?" Pitts asked.

"More or less, she's a rejected actress. She once was a big player in a Shakespeare festival near where I grew up. She played Hermia once, and got a little too,um, friendly, with the guy who played Lysander at a cast party, and then she made all the gossip of '41 and well into '42." Amber was glad to let her story out so the rumors that would inevitably fly wuld hopefully be nipped in the bud by those that knew the truth.

The boys slowly did the math and their faces showed their shock as they let out a collective "Whoa." 

Amber smiled sadly. "Yeah. Whoa is right. That's my life. Unfortunatly, my mother got really pissed that she was disgraced, and her Lysander was only midly punished with a pay cut. So she got all 'women's rights' and has been, for about eighteen years." Amber's sarcastic front was slowly crumbling.

"So, you're from Virginia?" Knox could sense Amber's uneasiness.

"Yeah, Yeah, I'm a real Southern-Bell," Amber turned on a thick, fake Southern accent, "I'm all about Corn-bread and hoop-skirts." 

"You don't sound it," Knox said, as everybody laughed at Amber's dialect trick.

"My mother brought me up like any actress, to sound neutral. Not an 'ain't' or a twang to me." Amber returned to her normal speech pattern.

"Now, gentleman, let's reveal to Amber what the four pillars *really* are." Charlie slyly suggested, from his place at Amber's desk.

Knox had already seen Amber's rough side, so he knew Amber wouldn't be offended, but Meeks, Pitts amd Todd looked shocked. The word play on the four pillars was fine for just guys, but around a girl? Talk about being uncouth.

"Don't worry. I wouldn't suggest it around any other girl, but any girl that would call her own mother, a 'milatant feminist jackass', openly to two strangers is *not* going to be offended." Dalton was quickly recognizing that Amber was no dainty little girl, but more one of the guys.

"Fill me in, fellas. What *are* the four pillars?" Amber now had to know.

"Travesty.Horror. Decadence. Excrement" The boys waited for Amber's reaction, and were quite pleased when she laughed.

"Nice word play, boys. You really don't have to worry about offending me. My mother didn't raise me as a dainty little girly-girl. Just consider me, Amber. Not a girl, just Amber." 

That was all the boys needed. Now they knew: Amber wanted them to be themselves, just guys, around her.

"Amber, we normally start off each year with a study group, that goes on throughout the year.We all have our own specialties. What are you especially good at?" Meeks said, getting the business out of the way. 

Amber looked over her subject list. "Well, not math, not physics, certainly not Latin. Maybe English or History."

"Well, I can safely say nobody here is really all that good with History, so consider it yours. We've got a study group. What do you say to Latin, at 8'clock, in my room?" Meeks said.

The group murmered agreement. 

After a moment of silence, Amber suddenly jumped up.

" I knew it. I knew I recognized your names. You guys were part of that Dead Poets Society." 

The boys looked beyond stunned.

"How, How did you know?" Knox finally found his voice after the shock. 

"My mom went to like 50 thousand one-on-one meetings with Nolan. I went to one, and they left me alone, in Nolan's office, for like hours. I got bored, and a little nosy. I did some snooping, and found that paper you all signed. Sounded like a blast." Amber sat back down, not remorseful in the slightest that she had her mother's snooping talents.

" I wouldn't fully trust that paper. It came from the mouth of a little red-headed fink." Knox miserably remembered that paper he'd been forced to sign.

"Well, I figured as much, papers like that aren't signed for good reasons. But the idea of getting out, and reading poetry, and being free thinkers? Sounds like a lot of fun." Amber had that womanly charm that could prove to be quite dangerous.

The boys all murmered along the lines of, "Yeah. A lot of fun." 

Charlie stood up. " I say it could be, still. In honor of Neil and Mr.Keating, I say we reconvene the Welton chapter of the Dead Poets Society. Todd, you ended up getting the book, right?" 

"Charlie, I don't know. After last year, should we really try it?" Todd skirted around the question.

"Do you have the goddamn book or not?" 

"Yes,but..." Todd knew he had given Charlie the answer he was looking for.

"So what's the problem? Does 'Carpe Diem' and 'sucking the marrow out of life' mean shit to you anymore?" Charlie was getting close to yelling. " Or did it die with Neil, and was it buried when Keating left?" 

The boys were silent for a moment and Amber began to wish she hadn't said a word, when Knox broke the silence.

" I say we do it," he exclaimed, quietly but eagerly, "Carpe Diem." 

Those two words, from someone a little more logical than Charlie, changed the whole group spirt.

"Whose in?" Charlie asked, eyes sparkling with excitment.

"I'm in." Knox exclaimed.

"Me too." Pitts said.

" I assume I'm invited, so I'm in" Amber beamed.

"Me too." Meeks,after a little deliberation, added his agreement.

"Of course I'm in. And, this year, I might even read some." Todd agreed.

"Good. I say we go tonight. Start the school year off right." Charlie exclaimed.

"Just come get me when we go. I'll probably be awake." Amber said, as the boys got up to go. 

Knox was the last to leave. "Thanks, Amber. You helped invoke the spirit of the Society again," he whispered, smiling at her. 

"No problem." Amber smiled back, as she gently shut her door. So maybe Welton wouldn't be so bad after all.


	2. In the Still of the Night

A/N: I'm back – I'm sorry it took so long, and I wanted to put more up this time, but 2 hours is all the library gives me and the school year makes writing for fun all but impossible. I need a home computer no doubt but when you only get paid $5.50 an hour working part time it becomes very hard to get one. And while Amber smokes, she's just my alter ego- I don't smoke- Amber's just a little bolder than I am. Okay, nothing more from me. I still don't own them and all poetry is not mine unless I say so.  
  
Here goes nothing  
  
"You've never had a word of Latin in your life, have you?" Knox asked Amber after the study group that night.  
"Not a word. I took more practical things like home economics and typing. I would've been the only girl in Latin." Amber whispered, looking a little flushed.  
"Well, it will do fine for McAllister." Knox reassured her while Amber leaned against her door.  
"See you tonight?" Amber asked.  
"Yeah, about 11? Does that give you time to get in the bathroom?" Knox said. Amber had told them how she had to wait until the boys all cleared the bathroom then she only had 15 minutes to get ready for bed. Showers were another ridiculous rule all together. Amber nodded then slipped in her room.  
Amber had just fallen into a light and restless sleep when she found her self being gently shaken awake and Knox's voice asking if she was still coming. She murmured a "Yeah" before fighting her way out of the tangle of covers she'd managed to create. She grabbed her coat, slipped on her flats and followed Knox silently out the door and joined the rest.  
Used to warm nights in even September, Amber shivered involuntarily as she followed to the cave. When she finally reached it, she was shivering but fully awake.  
"Are you okay?" I should have offered you my coat." Knox said, helping her into the cave.  
"I'm fine. I'm just not used to a fall that's actually cold, at least not this early in the fall." Amber laughed a little despite shivering teeth. Knox was quite pleased when they sat down to find that Amber moved in closer to him to keep warm. Charlie stood up holding the slightly battered thick bluish-grey book.  
"Gentlemen, and Amber, consider the Dead Poets Society reconvened at Welton. As the person who inspired us to remember the ideas of the Dead Poets, Amber Floyd should have the honor of reading the opening message." Amber stood up to the applause and took the book. Charlie held the flashlight so she could see and Amber's soft, clear voice gave a feminine touch to the otherwise familiar words.  
"I went to the woods because I wanted to live deliberately.  
I wanted to live deep and suck the marrow out of life.  
To put to rout all that was not life, and not, when I came to die  
Discover that I had not lived." Amber sat down with a low whistle of awe. As Amber had been reading, Meeks had spread his coat on the ground for a picnic blanket of sorts and the boys had tossed in some fruit and cookies. Charlie passed around his cigarettes muttering darkly about "These things cost money." "Yeah, but doesn't it feel good to share." Amber said, as she took one and lit up. She looked up at all the semi-shocked faces. "What, women can smoke too. Plus, I grew up in Virginia. Tobacco is a big part of my history." A few more puffs then she put it out. "Just because I can doesn't mean I like to. I'll pay you for it Charlie." Amber reached in her coat pocket and tossed a quarter to the resident 'bad-boy'. Everybody laughed as the meeting got started.  
Amber gladly covered up that night. The meeting had been wonderful; listening to boys read poetry and be so passionate. But that cave was cold. Vermont was cold. Amber tried to fall asleep but she couldn't. Exhilaration from the meeting, plus the vibe of a new place kept her awake. Plus she could've sworn she heard sobbing in the hallway. No, she was sure of it. Amber kicked off the covers and quietly opened the door. There, head in hands, knees drawn up to his chest was Knox, trying to muffle shuddering sobs. Amber melted right there. She dropped to her knees beside him and threw her arms around him. "Shh, it'll be all right." She whispered. Knox tried to protest but couldn't so he let Amber hold him. Finally he regained his composure a little.  
"This moment never happened. Charlie, Todd, Meeks, or Pitts, they can never know what happened." He whispered in earnest.  
"Got it. They won't know, but can I? It might make you fill better to talk about it." Amber said gently running her fingers through his hair.  
"I...I miss Neil. He was one of my closest friends, and he kind of had a rough home life. His dad wouldn't let him act, and he disobeyed, and his dad threatened to take him out of Welton and was making him become a doctor and he...he killed himself. Just before Christmas break last year. He was a big part of the Society and the meeting it just did something to me. I couldn't let Charlie hear me crying about it. I didn't want anybody to hear me." Knox looked about ready to cry again.  
"I'm a woman, I have a sixth sense for pain. Your secret is safe with me though. But don't you think they miss Neil too?"  
"Yeah, but guys just don't cry, not like this." Knox's tone was so final that Amber knew it was pointless to argue. She hugged him tight once more and they head their separate ways. Amber watched Knox quietly walk back to his room like nothing had ever happened and shook her head. Apparently guys were a lot more complex then her mother gave them credit for. 


	3. Sincerly

Earth Angel Chapter 3: Sincerely A/N: I am sooooooooo sorry. I had this chapter written and the next, and then I had to turn my computer back into the school to be fixed. All my hard work....poof! Gone. Bye - Bye!. And I had thrown away my hard copies. But, enough about me, let's get on with the story. Still don't own 'em but still want them. MERRY CHRISTMAS; HAPPY HANAUKAH; HAPPY KWANZAA: HAPPY HOLIDAYS :-)

"I am going to fail. That is all there is to it." Pitt's moaned, looking over his history notes in study group one night in Amber's room "It can't be that bad." Amber said, reaching over and grabbing his notes. "Or, it could be...did you get anything out of the review?" "I tried. It's just so boring." The other boys nodded in agreement. Amber rolled her eyes in exasperation. "It might be boring the way it's taught, but it's not boring if you look at it the right way. Look, we've been going over the Civil War. I come from a town with monuments to all the great Southern leaders, like Robert E Lee. I'm from the capital of the Confederacy for goodness sake. I kinda have no choice in being immersed in the war between the states. Let me see what I can do to make this more interesting." With that Amber all but retaught the lesson, making history come alive with her passion. Even Meeks was taking notes. By lights out, the boys seemed to get enough to at least get a B.

"An 'A'. I got an 'A', on a history test." Pitts looked pleased.  
"This was the only time I didn't second guess my answers" Todd half-whispered, smiling shyly as he held up an 'A' paper "Harvard, here I come." Meeks said, as he looked at his paper with satisfaction.  
"Like you weren't all ready, Meeks. But, Amber, you've officially earned the rank of history genius. Look at this 'A'." Charlie said, with even more self-confidence than normal. "Yeah, 'A' for anatomy. Come on, aren't you a little old to be doodling on your papers? And naked women? Come on, that's for thirteen year-olds just discovering Playboy." Amber gently teased with a smile. "What? He went over it, and I got bored"  
Charlie said with a shrug.  
Amber decided it was time to change the subject. "How'd you do on the test, Knox"  
Knox looked up from his paper. Without a word, he leaned in and kissed Amber on the cheek. Amber stood stunned for a second, then, with a faintly nervous laugh, asked "That good, huh"  
"Good? Try amazing! I didn't do so well in history last year, this is the perfect way to start my year off." Knox said, smiling more at his boldness than the achievement. The group headed off toward dinner, but Amber stopped Knox abruptly, grabbing his arm and pulling him aside.  
"What the hell was that all about? And don't say good grades"she demanded, in a harsh tone to cover her true feelings.  
"It...just...I don't..." Knox stammered, not sure what to make of Amber's tone.  
"Knox, your babbling. Now, like an intelligent person, what was that kiss about? I know,  
and I know you know, it was about more than grades. Spill!" Amber said, less harsh than before.  
"Amber, you probably are going to want to deck me after this, but I ... your..I like you, a lot, like in a 'I want you to be my girlfriend' kind of way. I just felt that it was the right moment. If I'd known you wouldn't have liked it, I wouldn't have done it. Damn it, I'm such an idiot." Knox hung his head.  
Amber leaned in and kissed him on the cheek. "Not an idiot, not at all. It just startled me.  
But Knox, we can't, I repeat, CANNOT, start much of anything between us." Her tone was gentler than Knox had ever heard.  
"Why?" He asked, sounding much younger than his 18 years.  
"Because, we live less than 2 feet apart. If we broke up, it would be so awkward." Amber hated when her logical side took over. "What if I promised..." Knox started.  
"Don't make promises you can't keep. It's about the only good thing my mother taught me."Amber said, biting her lower lip.  
"I can keep it, I swear." Knox looked so desperate that Amber kissed him on the cheek once more saying, "We'll see. Now lets get to dinner before we get in trouble." She ran off, leaving Knox in stunned silence.

"Gentleman, and Amber, I'm renouncing my given name. I'm going back to Nuwanda"  
Charlie announced at a meeting that night.  
Amber looked a little confused as the others laughed. "Don't worry about it. Charlie here decided that he was too passionate for his given name last year. So, he became Nuwanda." Knox explained.  
Amber just nodded. That boy got stranger and stranger every second of the day.  
"Okay, Gentleman, Amber and Nuwanda, here's a question I've been giving a lot of thought to lately. What five things do you want most in the world? No order, not logical,  
just what do you want most?" Meeks spoke up out of nowhere "Easy. Endless smokes,  
Lifetime subscription to Playboy,to legally change my name to Nuwanda, a girl for one arm, and a girl for the other." Char ...er... Nuwanda said.  
"Can I hit you now or should it wait?" Amber said, waving the book threateningly in his general direction. "Hey, your the one who wanted to be treated like everyone else"  
Nuwanda pointed out.  
"Damn it. You've got a point." Amber said, twisting her mouth up.  
"Okay, Meeks. You posed the topic. What five things do you want most in the world "  
Charlie asked. "To something Nobel prize worthy, To travel to some exotic place, To meet Marilyn Monroe, To settle down with a loving wife, and to be a millionaire." Meeks said. "Todd, what five things would you like most"  
Todd looked up shocked. Meeks always passed questions on to Pitts. "Um, well. I want to settle down, that's for certain. I hate to admit it, but I'd like to have a million dollars. I want the world to be equal. I want more self-confidence. What I really want, though, is for once, for my parents to see me outside of my brothers shadow. I'd trade it all in for that." Todd looked so forlorn that nobody spoke for a minute. "What things do you want most in the world, Pittsie?" Amber finally broke the silence.  
" I guess I'd like to travel to Europe. I know I'd like to be rich. I want people to be equal,  
women with men, blacks with whites, everybody with everybody. I'd like to get married but I'd take her name so people would stop teasing me about mine. And I'd give good money if I could just grow into my body." Pitts said, wrapping his long arms around his even longer legs. "Don't worry about it, Pitts. When you do grow into it, you'll be a very tall and rather attractive young man." Amber said, giving him a friendly pat on the back.  
"What five things do you want most, Knox?" "Well,hmm. I'd like to be allowed to study what I wanted in college, not law, that's for sure. I'd like people everywhere to be equal.  
I'd like to settle down, if I find the right woman," here Knox looked knowingly at Amber who shot him a look that said "Cool it". Quickly Knox continued. "If they don't have to be logical, then I'd really like to be able to see Neil again or speak to him, somehow. I know it's impossible but it's what I want. I'd also give almost anything if Mr. Keating could come back as a teacher here." Everyone was silent for a few moments. Even Amber understood, little bits of the past had been given to her in the past few weeks. "Well, all that's left is me I guess. Let me just say this now and put in on top of my list. I too want the world to be equal, but I think I'm the only one who truly means that. You guys are white males. The world is yours right now. Sure, women can vote, but we are hardly equal enough. Maybe I'm being hard, and maybe you do want equality, but it's so easy for you. Try being on the other side of the fence. I don't mean to be harsh, it just had to be said. Now, to the lighter side of my wants. I'd give good money. if I had it, to meet Lucille Ball. She's been an idol of mine for a long time. I'd like to meet my father, to know what he looks like, something. All I know about him is what my mother tells me, and that's not favorable to say the least.  
This is going to sound weird, but what I want most is an apron and a sewing kit, a really good kit, complete with fabrics, and buttons, and do-dad thingys. My mother never wanted me to learn womanly arts. I learned how to do most of them in home ec, and my grandmother always let me help her bake, but I'd really love those two things." Amber said, showing the rare glimpse of her softer side.  
"Well, I hate to say it, but I say meeting adjourned. I can't afford too much trouble this year." Nuwanda said, standing up.

When they got back to the dorms, Knox stood outside his for a second, watching Amber.  
She'd seemed so tired the past few weeks, not sick, just run-down. Plus, she'd had a cold that she said she just couldn't shake. Sure enough, Amber laid her head on the cool wood of her door before going in. Knox watched with keen eyes, then slipped into his room. He didn't see Charlie sitting up on his bed, doing some last minute Latin homework with a flashlight held closely to his book.  
"Gotta stop worrying about her. She's just not used to Hell-ton yet. It's a lot on a body at first."He said, causing Knox to nearly jump out of his skin. "Jesus, Charlie, you scared me." Knox said, catching his breath. "But, I don't think it's just that. Something else is wrong. She's sicker than she's letting on." "You worry too much, Knoxous. Calm down for a while. If she's still run down in a month or she gets any worse, then you can worry. "  
Charlie said, trying to reassure his friend.  
"I don't know, Charlie, I just don't know. " Knox said, as he climbed into bed 


	4. Great Pretender

Earth Angel Chapter 4: The Great Pretender

"Maybe Charlie was right. Amber's fine" Knox muttered to himself on the following Friday night, as they all headed for the cave. Amber, caught up in a moment of passion and sprit was dancing through the woods. Knox had never seen anyone so happy and care-free. "Come on slow-poke" Amber called back . Knowing that he would never live it down if he was bested by a female, Knox started on a mad dash toward the cave, managing to beat Amber by a half- second.

"I don't know how, but you cheated some how." Amber got out in-between catching her breath.

"Rematch when we leave." Knox said, catching his own breath.

"You're on. " Amber stuck her tongue out at her adversary, before ducking in the cave. Knox tried to follow suit, only to whack his head on the entrance.

"Watch you're head there." Amber said with a smirk . Knox just shook his head before sitting down near Amber.

"Alright, lets get this thing underway." Nuwanda said, opening the book.

After the opening message, Amber took the book, and began flipping through it .

"What are you looking for?" Todd asked.

"Poe. This is a book of some the great romantic works. Poe was a dark romantic , but a romantic none the less. Besides, he was a Virginian, and, don't think I'm silly, but some times I get a little homesick. I mean, you guys are away from home too, but not like 500 miles away. True, my mother is renting a house up here, but it's not home. You guys are like family to me, but some times, I…damn it. Not in here. How can a book of romantic poetry not at the very least have 'The Raven' or 'Annabel Lee'." Amber flung the book down. "I'm sorry. I 'm just not feeling very well. I'm going back up." Amber said as she took a deep breath and, wavering a bit but steadying herself quickly, stood up. Knox grabbed on to her arm, silently offering support, physical and emotional, but Amber shook it off, turning and mouthing "I' am fine" with eyes that were fierce and fiery.

Not knowing exactly what to do or say, the society followed Amber out to the edge of the woods, silently. They watched her run off and saw, in almost slow motion , her crumple to the ground. They all ran off after her, Knox getting there a split second before the others. He tried to pick her up, but Meeks stopped him.

"Don't. Think about it. She's gotta get inside on her own two feet. We can't get back in carrying her without getting caught. We've gotta get up a whole mess of steps." He knelt down beside Amber, pushing his glasses up with one hand and gently trying to nudge her awake with the other. With a little gentle prodding and patience, Amber came around.

"What happened.?" she whispered.

"Don't worry about that now. You just need to get upstairs and go to bed." Charlie said gently, helping Amber to her feet. Amber nodded. With Knox as support, she got up the stairs and crawled into bed, falling into a restless sleep as soon as her head touched the pillow.

"Well, genius, what's your take on this?" Charlie asked, leaning against Amber's door.

" She's sick, really sick. A lot sicker than she's letting on. Outside, when I was trying to get her back around, I noticed she was burning up. And did you see those bruises? Those aren't right. She's not that clumsy. Plus, that cold is lasting too long. I don't know what it is but she needs to get medical attention soon. I'd say tell Dr. Haggar, but…" Meeks didn't finish his sentence, he didn't need to. Every conscious person in that room could finish it. They were in a fix. Catch 22 you might call it. Tell on them selves and Amber got to the doctor she needed to see but get themselves expelled, or stay silent and let Amber quite probably get worse.

"Come on guys, we should get back to bed, before Haggar makes his rounds and we get in trouble anyway." Pitts said.

Everybody left, though Charlie had to drag Knox away.

After a night of restless worrying, Knox leaped out of bed the next morning. Hoping Amber would be awake, he knocked softly on her door.

"Come in" Amber called , her voice a little groggy.

Knox pushed open the door, and found Amber sitting up in bed, still in a nightgown and robe.

"Did I wake you up?" he asked, afraid he'd been too hasty.

"Not really. I've been up for a few hours just thinking." Amber said, clearing her throat.

"Amber, you fainted last night, after leaving the meeting . You need to tell Dr. Hagar . You've had that cold for about a month now, and you're getting worse, if that's at all possible." Knox said, trying to sound more forceful than worried.

"I'm fine Knox. I've just not slept all that well lately. Here's the deal. I can't jeopardize you and Nuwanda, Meeks, Pittsie, and Todd's future here just because I have a cold, and am having a hard time sleeping. I'm going back to sleep, if Nolan or Hagar notices, than tell them I'm not feeling well, which is true. If I feel better, which I will, I'll come down and watch you practice for the big soccer match, okay. Now, please, just go." Amber said, pulling back up the covers.

Knox left, shaking his head and muttering under his breath about "Stubborn Woman". He slammed the door to his room, waking Charlie up.

"What are you so pissed about?" Charlie asked, kicking off the covers.

"Her." Knox pointed toward Amber's room. "Won't tell Hagar what happened . Just says she's tired and hasn't been sleeping well. Horse-Shit." Know was furiously digging through his chest-of-drawers.

"Knox, let it be man, let it be. Amber's a smart and independent female. She wouldn't do what someone told her to do just because. She has to need it herself."

When Charlie started to sound like a voice of reason, Knox knew it was time to back off. But not with out one more swing.

"Still, she's still as stubborn as a mule."

"That she is buddy, that she is." Charlie laughed, as he got up.

At soccer practice that morning, Knox got so wrapped up in the sport that he hardly noticed Amber come down to the field. Her long hair was down in two braids and she wore a casual skirt, with the coat pulled tightly around her. Aside from the fact that she looked rather pale, Knox had to admit, she looked good like that, casual and relaxed.

As soon as the coach left for a few minutes, Charlie called out

"Come on, Amber, play with us."

"I'm not that good. Plus, won't your coach be mad?" Amber said, though anyone with a brain could see she was itching to play.

"O'Harlon? Hell no. He won't be back for a while. And if you can kick, you're good enough for practice. " Charlie said.

"Just for a little bit than" Amber said, grinning a mile wide.

She wasn't great, but she didn't care. She was having a blast, and actually getting the ball to go strait when she felt a sudden light-headedness come over her. The horizon was starting to spin and images were blurring. Next thing she knew was blackness.

Knox had heard the thump and turned around. Charlie had seen the collapse, and both stood in shock for a second before both rushing to the unconscious figure. A crowd was starting to form.

"Don't just stand there, morons, go get Coach O'Harlon and Dr. Nolan…NOW!" Charlie yelled, as he dropped to his knees beside Amber. Knox was on the other side, gently trying to bring her back to consciousness.

Under any other circumstances, watching Dr Nolan, who was so old, and Coach O'Harlon, who was not very fit for a soccer coach, running, would've been hilarious, had the situation not been so grave. But the way they handled things was no laughing matter. Coach O'Harlon herded all the boys away, except Knox and Charlie. He ordered a boy who he knew was fast to call for an ambulance. He then gently picked up Amber, as Nolan took over.

"Misters Overstreet and Dalton, you are to follow with Coach O'Harlon and wait until an ambulance arrives. Then you are to return to you regular Saturday activities. All the rest of you are return to your dormitories for the remainder of your scheduled practice time, then on to the rest of your day. NOW!" Nolan barked. Boys fled left and right, except Charlie and Knox, who followed with Coach O'Harlon to the front hall, where he gently placed Amber on a bench, then went outside to wait for the paramedics.

Knox stood , looking at his feet, the walls, anything. He just couldn't bare to look at Amber. Charlie stood next to him, not sure what to do or say. It didn't seem like anything he could think of was appropriate. Sometimes silence was best.

Charlie practically had to drag Knox upstairs when the paramedics came and it was all that anyone could do to get him to sleep when the Amber didn't return that night, or the next.


	5. Too Young

Chapter 5: Too Young

A/N: Just wanted to say that you need to remember it is still 1960 so things we take for granted, like medicine, don't exist yet. Can't give much away but, I thought I should remind people that while 1960 was that start of some big changes medicine wasn't hitting on much.

Still don't own them.

Amber didn't return for a week. When finally she did return, she moved toward her room like a zombie.

"What did the doctor say?" Meeks asked.

Amber just shook her head and walked toward her room. Knox tried to follow her, but Todd stopped him.

"She'll tell you when she wants you to know. Let her be right now." Todd whispered.

Knox bit his bottom lip but nodded. He knew that Todd was right. He went back in a his room, and tried to concentrate on the physics he'd been studying.

About a half an hour later, Amber emerged from her room, eyes red and puffy. She knocked on Knox and Charlie's door, and grabbed Knox's wrist and pulled him to her room, where she slammed the door and kissed him full on the lips, then burst into tears.

"What the hell?" Knox was so confused.

"I just had to do it. I don't know how many more opportunities I'll get. I'm… I'm dying Knox." Amber managed to get out.

"But…your…I mean…"Knox sat down on the floor.

"Have you ever heard of Leukemia?" Amber asked, sitting beside him.

"Once or twice, studying about diseases in biology. I know it's a type of cancer, and that they're working on treatments…but nothing has come out of it. No…No…No…" Knox looked like he couldn't believe it.

"Yes. I've got maybe a year left, maybe a few months more, a few less." Amber tried to check the wavering in her voice.

"There isn't anything that they can do?" Knox asked. He looked about ready to cry.

"Everything is just too experimental. My mother won't risk it." Amber said, standing up. "Knox, promise me something. You'll stay with me, until…you know."

Knox nodded. "I promise." He didn't want to argue over inevitabilities just yet. It still hadn't fully sunk in yet.

" Knox, is there somewhere we go, so I can tell the guys before Nolan makes a huge ordeal over it in services on Sunday?"

Knox nodded. "I know just the place."

Amber stood up, steadied her nerves and followed Knox to get the boys and to the luggage room.

"This can't be good. The five of us are magnets for bad news in this room." Meeks said.

"Sorry Meeks, it isn't any better this time." Amber said, looking around at the puzzled and worried faces in front of her. " I can't think of a way to put this delicately, so I just have to come right out and say it. I'm dying. I have Leukemia." Amber quickly lowered her gaze to her lap, she couldn't stand to look them in their eyes, it would've been too painful.

All was quite for a moment, as they let the news seep in. Finally, Charlie broke the silence.

"There's nothing anyone can do?" He asked, softer than Amber had ever heard before.

"No. It's all still in experimental stages." Amber said, still looking down.

"How long do you have?" Pitts finally asked the inevitable question.

"A year, maybe a little more, a little less. And I haven't even told you the worst of it." Amber said, finally looking up.

"There's worse news?" Knox asked, from his place on an overturned luggage with Amber at his feet on the floor.

"My mother wants to pull me out of Welton. I got her to let me stay through Christmas break…" Amber started, but was interrupted by Todd, who, before he could stop it, blurted out, "That's only two weeks away."

"I know. She's coming back the day before we leave, and taking me out to lunch, where hopefully we will discuss things like adults, which is highly unlikely. Hopefully, she will see my point that I'd rather spend what little time I have here, with you guys, my family." Amber looked at the sea of faces, all so lost and hurt. Pitts stood by the little window, head on the glass, thoughtful. Meeks sat in the corner, on a piece off baggage, face turned to the wall to hide his emotion. Todd stood against the wall of suitcases, arms crossed, head down, occasionally reaching up to wipe his eyes.

Amber turned to Knox, who sat with his head in his hands. Twice he'd heard her say that phrase and each time it hurt more than before.

Amber looked across at Charlie. Even he was misty-eyed. Her bad-boy was shaken. It was too much for her. She'd vowed, after the night she'd comforted Knox in the hallway, never to see a man cry again. She stood up and ran out of the room.

The boys looked up at the slam of the door, but silently agreed to let her be.

It wasn't like their was anything they could do anyway.

Finally Charlie broke the silence. "Un Be -Fucking -lievable. Absolutely unbelievable." He called out to no one imparticular . "How in the hell do they expect us to believe in a just and loving God when shit like this happens?"

"Haven't you learned, Nuwanda, that life is completely unfair? First Neil, now Amber. People get ripped from us like crazy anymore." Knox said. Bitterly. He'd moved from Denial and Shock to Anger.

"Maybe it's good we know now." Todd said, quietly. Four pairs of eyes looked at him expectedly.

"Think about it. How much worse would it be if she'd never found out and died in a year without so much as any warning? Remember how awful the shock was when Neil…well…you know? At least now we have a chance to come to terms with it all. It's horrible, awful, and unbelievably unfair. But it's a fact and it can't be changed, no matter how much we want it to. So we just have to do what we can to enjoy this year and when the time comes, it won't hit so hard." Todd finished. He stood in his place in silence, waiting to see what his friends would think.

He didn't have to wait long. Charlie got up and gave him a friendly hug. "Todd, thank you." Was all he said, but Todd knew he'd said the right things.

On an impulse , the boys stood up. As one. Which was how they'd have to remain if they were to make it through the year.


	6. That Lonesome Road

A/N: I wanted to finish this earlier but I had a quick-fic that wouldn't let me sleep until it was written. I dashed that off in two hours and had no energy left to work on this afterwards. I did make a vow to myself to get this up over my spring break. And I did.

2: One continuity error. Earlier, I made references to Amber's mother being Ms. Floyd, then I realized I never said that Amber's mother married Amber's father, so I changed names. It just works best this way.

Disclaimer: I STILL don't own them : goes to beg at Peter Weir's door:

Chapter 6: That Lonesome Road

Two weeks passed very quickly. Amber woke up that Sunday morning early, just as the sun was starting to rise. She looked out side, and was rather surprised to see snow. She was still having a hard time adjusting to weather up north. In Virginia she'd stopped expecting snow until mid-January at the earliest.

She dug into her chest-of-drawers for her one pair of jeans. Pulling the Welton sweatshirt over her head, and pulling her dark hair into a ponytail, she knew she'd be able to go for a walk un-detected. She had to clear her head. Glad that Welton wouldn't let the students lock the doors to their dorms, she snuck into Knox's room, and found his battered old Converse. Deciding against leaving a note, Amber took those and snuck out the door. She retreated to her room, grabbed her coat and some of the money her mom gave her every month, shut the door carefully, and snuck down the stairs, sock footed . As soon as she was in the main hall, she put the shoes on, marveling at how comfortable they were, especially compared to her white tennis shoes which were designed, she believed, to torture her feet. Pulling her coat around her tightly, she stepped into the snow and began to walk, heading completely off campus. Her mind began to wander, something she hadn't let it do since that devastating Saturday when she'd told the boys her news. That Sunday was worse at the school services. She knew as soon as she sat down that Nolan would preach about life, death, and that thing he called "God's plan" and how mysterious it was. And he did, and he made it impossible for Amber to go anywhere without what seemed like 1,000,000 eyes were on her. And Amber, who often spent spare time helping in the main office, was starting to hate the main secretary. As well meaning as the phrase was, " I'll be praying for you" made Amber ready to scream, after hearing it and many variations of it every day for 12 days from that lady. And she was sick of being treated like a porcelain doll.

"I'm not dead yet" she screamed, to no one in particular. Luckily, she was completely alone, and the only reaction she got was from a squirrel who scurried up a tree as she passed by. Amber continued walking through the neighborhood . She knew of an all-night diner near by, thanks to the boys, and she really wanted coffee and a donut. She didn't know why, she just needed the caffeine and sugar.

When she reached the diner, she ordered the coffee and donut and sat in a back corner booth. She stole the paper some body had left in a near by booth. First, she read the funnies, she was still very much a child at heart. Then she skimmed all the articles. Seeing were the world was made her feel her state of things truly might not be that bad. Keeping her voice low, she ordered another donut and a refill on her coffee. She glanced at the clock on the back wall. It was just nearing 6:30. If she was back at the school by 7:45, giving her time to change before morning services at 8:00 sharp, she knew she'd be okay. Out of seemingly nowhere, a thought crossed her mind, reminding her that her mother would be deciding whether or not she was to stay at Welton for the rest of the School Year.

At the thought of her mother, Amber felt a throbbing in her head. Never could one person cause as much stress on a person as Amber's mother did her. Paying her bill, Amber left a tip and headed back toward campus, finishing her doughnut as she left.

Making it back to campus with time to spare, Amber snuck into her room, changed into her Sunday dress, took off the comfortable Converse and slipped them back in Knox's room. Hopefully he hadn't noticed they were gone. She got back in her room, found her black pumps, and, after some rummaging, found her stockings. Her feet protesting every second, she squeezed them into her pumps and with a flick of the brush, her hair was presentable. She was now a presentable young lady. She shivered at that thought. A quick glance in the mirror and it was off to services. She slid in the door just as the usher went to shut it. She quickly placed herself next to Meeks on the aisle.

"Where were you?" Knox asked in a whisper, leaning over Pitts and Meeks.

"Out. I'll tell you about it after services." Amber whispered back quickly.

Knox sat back in his chair and rolled his eyes as Nolan started droning on and on about something.

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

"So, where were you this morning?" Knox asked Amber as they left service and headed to their rooms.

"I went for a walk and cleared my head. Is that a crime?" Amber asked, in no mood to put up with Knox's stuff that morning.

"Just curious." Knox murmured.

"Listen. I'm just worried about today. Have you forgotten what today is?" Amber said.

Knox shook his head and went into his room. He wasn't going to mess with this for anything right now.

00000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000

Amber sat across from her mother, staring into her chicken and mashed potatoes. Laura Edwards, a tall, thin woman with dark hair and eyes as green as her daughters, the only trait they seemed to share.

"How's the chicken?" Ms. Edwards asked, trying to break the wall of stony silence her daughter had put up almost as soon as they sat down.

"Better than at school." Amber said, chasing a pea around her plate.

"Amber, we need to talk. Your grandmother in Richmond has agreed to let us stay with her. You could go back to public school, and get better care."

"Mom, I really like Welton now. I want to stay there. I'm really good friends with some of the guys, and it's what I want." Amber said, struggling not to yell.

"But, how can I take care of you if you stay there. What will people say, knowing I let my daughter, my DYING daughter, stay at some snooty prep school that didn't want her in the first place."

Amber jumped up at that, knocking her fork to the ground, causing a satisfying clatter.

"Damn it, Mother. I should have known you didn't care about me. I'm a pawn in your little public-relations game. You're an unmarried young mother and you just want to prove to people that you can take care of me even if my father left you for some 'dirty little tramp'. I am staying at Welton, and you will have to drag me kicking and screaming back to Virginia." Amber dug in her purse and slammed down a few bills. "This should cover my half of the meal". With that, Amber stormed off, eyes too full of hot tears to notice the shocked and awed stares of other diners.

Amber limped into Welton just after dinner. Her feet hurt, pumps were not made for long distance walking. During the cold and rather lonely walk, Amber had realized maybe she was hasty in her conclusion. Maybe it wasn't only green eyes that the women had in common, maybe it was temper. She was so caught up in regret that she didn't see Charlie heading down the same stairs she was heading up. They ran into each other.

"Hey, how'd it go?" Charlie innocently asked.

"Bad." Amber said, leaning on the railing.

"How bad?" Charlie asked, eyes getting wide.

"Well, I pleaded my case, mom said some things that pissed me off, I made an ass of myself and stormed out and walked the five miles back."

"Ouch." Charlie whispered, enveloping Amber, who was looking about ready to cry, into a friendly hug.

"I am such an ass. I accused my own mother of using me for a pawn in some twisted game, and I all but came right out and called her a whore, in front of about fifty people. I'll be lucky if she doesn't disown me." Amber tried to check her tears but couldn't help a few flowing freely.

"She won't disown you. You probably made some valid points, just maybe didn't do it in the best way."

Amber looked up at her 'honorary big-brother'. "You sure?"

"Positive. Now, the question I have to ask. Do you get to stay after break?"

"I don't know." Amber said with a sigh.

"Of course you do." A voice from behind them said. Both Amber and Charlie jumped about ten feet. Turning around, Amber was shocked to discover her mother standing there.

"Mom. I'm so sorry. I shouldn't have said what I said." Amber said.

"No, you had a perfectly valid point. I'd rather you not have made it so clearly in front of 57 people, but you had a point. If Welton means so much to you, of course you can stay. But I do care about you. More than you can ever know." Laura Edwards said, voice cracking a little as Amber, forgetting her age and company, ran to her mother like a lost child. "How can I get on with out you?"

"Mom, we have all year to answer that question. But I don't think we will ever be completely separated, no matter what." Amber sobbed.

"Hey, Charlie what's taking so lo…oh." Knox said, coming in to the hallway, followed by Meeks, Todd and Pitts. Charlie put up his hand from where he stood, thinking that had he seen something similar that night one year ago he'd be sharing this moment with Neil too.

Finally mindful of her surroundings, Amber broke away from her mother.

"Mom, these are my friends. That's Charlie Dalton, you know, mister 'Phone-call-from-God.' He's not so bad once you get to know him. That's Meeks, he's our resident genius. That's Pitts, one of the nicest people I've met here. That's Todd. He's got a real gift for poetry. And that is Knox, my, well, don't kill me, boyfriend."

The boys all nodded in turn, blushing at the praise, especially Knox who was thrilled to have Amber call him that. It was nice to have put a label on their relationship.

"Well if these are the boys you'll be staying with, I'm more then happy to have you stay here. But, I would like to take you home for break a little early. Boys, you are welcome to come to our house anytime over break. In fact, I expect you there Christmas Eve. I'm not much of a cook, but Amber and I together can make one amazing traditional Southern feast." Ms. Edwards said.

A chorus of "Yes Ma'am" followed as Amber dashed up stairs to get her luggage for break.

The boys stood silent, knowing that Ms. Edwards wanted them to be there for more than just a good meal. She wanted to make what would more than likely be her daughters last Christmas be special and memorable.


End file.
